


I am Myself with You

by Addfire



Category: Othello - Shakespeare
Genre: -Ish, AU where Iago (sort of) doesn't exist, F/M, Fix-It, This was a school project but damn if I don't want to flex it, in conclusion stan Emilia, listen i just really fucking hate Iago okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:49:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27647078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Addfire/pseuds/Addfire
Summary: When studying Othello’s deeply complicated relationship with racism, sexism, classism, and other forms of xenophobia, it’s extremely tempting to pay attention to the character most vocally racist, sexist, classist, and otherwise xenophobic– Iago. As early as the very first act and scene, where Iago lets Brabantio know that “an old black ram / Is topping your white ewe,” (Othello 1.1.90-91)  he’s both using racialized language by comparing Othello to an animal driven only by lust to dilute Brabantio’s pure stock, but he also makes use of sexist thought at the time by removing any agency from Desdemona in this declaration, and by placing Desdemona’s value in her purity as a virgin. Iago is aggressively bigoted, portrayed as such in a way that one would struggle to make his prejudices more obvious.  This functions surprisingly well at getting audiences to understand the language, cruelty, and injustice that define these systems of oppression. But by making this so obvious, the subtler ways in which these prejudices manifest, and the larger system they’re a part of, might go unnoticed.I want to attempt to examine how these characters might be affected by racism, sexism, and classism without Iago to make these things malicious weapons of cruelty. In what ways do implicit biases and prejudices inform how characters view each other? What perspectives are missed from a position of privilege? And, as Emma Smith highlights in her book This Is Shakespeare, how do issues of intersectionality affect all of these? She writes, correctly so, that “the plot of the play shows us different outsiders struggling with their own disempowered status in the majority society,” so how does someone who might be simultaneously the oppressed in a sexist society and the oppressor in a racist society exist?In this alternate timeline, Iago is unable to get Cassio drunk in Act 2, Scene 3, but Roderigo still attacks Cassio. Cassio, clear of mind, easily apprehends Roderigo, waking up Othello and Desdemona from what would have been the night they consummated their marriage in the process, and through torturing out information from Roderigo, Iago is incriminated and sent back to Venice. Emilia, being Desdemona’s only maid, isn’t given the choice to return to Venice with Iago, and is forced to stay behind and help around Cyprus. This scene takes place in Desdemona’s chambers, after all of the initial commotion over Iago’s departure has settled.
Relationships: Desdemona/Othello
Kudos: 2





	I am Myself with You

**Author's Note:**

> When studying Othello’s deeply complicated relationship with racism, sexism, classism, and other forms of xenophobia, it’s extremely tempting to pay attention to the character most vocally racist, sexist, classist, and otherwise xenophobic– Iago. As early as the very first act and scene, where Iago lets Brabantio know that “an old black ram / Is topping your white ewe,” (Othello 1.1.90-91) he’s both using racialized language by comparing Othello to an animal driven only by lust to dilute Brabantio’s pure stock, but he also makes use of sexist thought at the time by removing any agency from Desdemona in this declaration, and by placing Desdemona’s value in her purity as a virgin. Iago is aggressively bigoted, portrayed as such in a way that one would struggle to make his prejudices more obvious. This functions surprisingly well at getting audiences to understand the language, cruelty, and injustice that define these systems of oppression. But by making this so obvious, the subtler ways in which these prejudices manifest, and the larger system they’re a part of, might go unnoticed. 
> 
> I want to attempt to examine how these characters might be affected by racism, sexism, and classism without Iago to make these things malicious weapons of cruelty. In what ways do implicit biases and prejudices inform how characters view each other? What perspectives are missed from a position of privilege? And, as Emma Smith highlights in her book This Is Shakespeare, how do issues of intersectionality affect all of these? She writes, correctly so, that “the plot of the play shows us different outsiders struggling with their own disempowered status in the majority society,” so how does someone who might be simultaneously the oppressed in a sexist society and the oppressor in a racist society exist? 
> 
> In this alternate timeline, Iago is unable to get Cassio drunk in Act 2, Scene 3, but Roderigo still attacks Cassio. Cassio, clear of mind, easily apprehends Roderigo, waking up Othello and Desdemona from what would have been the night they consummated their marriage in the process, and through torturing out information from Roderigo, Iago is incriminated and sent back to Venice. Emilia, being Desdemona’s only maid, isn’t given the choice to return to Venice with Iago, and is forced to stay behind and help around Cyprus. This scene takes place in Desdemona’s chambers, after all of the initial commotion over Iago’s departure has settled.

EMILIA: So, tonight’s the night, then? 

DESDEMONA: 

The moon’s full light shines down on boundless joy.  
Marital affairs marshalled in Cyprus  
Appear as an island with equal  
Lack of senses to match the gain in beauty–  
Even if our sojourn lacks much logic,  
I’m o’ertaken by pleasing lights and sounds  
And have little to make complaint over.  
Even less complaint for your assistance.

EMILIA: And I thank you for keeping me here, changing your sheets, instead of with my husband in Venice. 

DESDEMONA: Of course! Being married to a man like Iago is unthinkable. Emilia, how could you bear it? He must have been so cruel.

EMILIA: He was. There were some days I couldn’t bear it, and spent whole days in my room. Other days I stayed the night in another man’s house–

DESDEMONA: You mean, you cheated on him?

EMILIA: He was cheating me of my happiness. Divorce isn’t possible, I had no other way to leave. 

DESDEMONA: No matter how cruel Othello might be to me, I would never betray him like that. 

EMILIA: 

That is a function of your naïveté.  
The gentler sex’s sole space is comfort:  
A mother ensures boys are full, happy,  
A whore ensures men are satisfied.  
Repeatedly, in every house, we serve  
Man’s destructive ego. It suffocates us.

DESDEMONA:

My joy is from Othello, not for him.  
His far-off bloody stories and landscapes  
Transported me from my father’s strict home;  
And he would bear a thousand stings before  
I would come to harm, if he was able.  
Even if the frigid arms of death took me  
And my time among you all was markéd,  
Othello’s blood would stain my foe’s cruel blade  
If it would cause that villain who harmed me  
To feel the pain I had suffer’d in spite.

EMILIA: 

Not every husband is your Othello.  
In Venice, in your father’s strict household,  
In its arches harsh with imported granite,  
You had no need to walk through diseaséd streets  
And trade coin in an apothecary,  
Watching medicines move from hand to hand  
Where man’s ailments might be cured with a deal.  
Most women understand this process well.

DESDEMONA: That’s true, I’ve never been to an apothecary. Besides getting a fever as a child, my health has been perfect. 

EMILIA: Right. Well, I should be going back to my chambers. Othello will be coming soon, and wouldn’t want to have a maid interrupt your night. 

DESDEMONA: Of course. Emilia, I want you to know that even when you talk about things I disagree with, I’m so glad for our friendship and for your counsel.

EMILIA: That’s very sweet of you, Desdemona. I feel similarly. 

[EMILIA exits, and DESDEMONA is alone in her chambers for a brief moment before OTHELLO enters.]

OTHELLO: Desdemona. I’m so happy to see you here tonight, after everything that’s happened.

DESDEMONA: It’s been a strange few days. Are you feeling alright about how Iago did all of that? And what he promised Roderigo?

OTHELLO: 

Iago in my mind was always honest.  
I’ve seen him vicious while involv’d in war,  
Vivisecting this Turk or that Spaniard  
With what might almost be perverted glee.  
But even then I sought for his council,  
As he had grown in the world and gained fresh eyes.  
Never would I think he a culprit  
Of what Roderigo claims he’s done,  
Yet tortured lips in efficient time  
Confess to god and man in the same breath.  
I’m hurt– we were brothers in arms, fighting  
On every battlefield I’ve told you of  
And then some battlefields beyond my tales.  
But what’s true is his betrayal of me.  
I reluctantly confront and accept this.  
My starting instinct, informed by birth under  
The hot sun encourages me to kill  
Were he here, he would be dead, and my sword  
Would drip with vindication and justice.  
But this is from my base temperament,  
And I will not waste time with violent dreams.  
My second instinct, informed by love of you,  
Is to drown in joy and relief: you’re here.

DESDEMONA: You are happy with me, aren’t you?

OTHELLO: Every moment with you, from our very first vows– no, to our very first meetings at your father’s, have been happy moments.

DESDEMONA: And the same is true for you. I may have lost my father, and overbearing and assertive as he was, his absence still hurts. But gaining you has been the most important gain in my life. 

OTHELLO: And you too– I didn’t know I could love this much before I met you. 

DESDEMONA: Mm. 

OTHELLO: You’ve prepared this room wonderfully– the flowers on the side table are so tasteful, and the bed somehow feels softer than it really is. 

DESDEMONA: Thank you! I didn’t do it by myself, though– Emilia made the bed and freshened up the sheets, and even helped me pick out my nightgown. 

OTHELLO: She’s an invaluable help– is she doing alright?

DESDEMONA: I think there was some frustration over not being able to speak with Iago before he was sent off. But she’s still doing fine– more than fine. 

OTHELLO: It’s a shame– she’s intelligent, sharp-witted, quick. If only she were the man, and Iago the woman, and I had gotten to fight alongside an Emilio under a red sun while our enemies beat down on us. To be a woman doesn’t seem quite fitting for her. Well, I’m–

[Enter CASSIO, drunk, and BIANCA.]

CASSIO: Going to get laid tonight! Woo!

BIANCA: Uh, Lieutenant, this isn’t the right room,

CASSIO:

Hush, my pretty jasper. I’m Lieutenant,  
And anywhere on Cyprus’ balmy land,  
I’m afforded passage– who would bar me?  
No hysterics on your part are needed,  
If some low soldier sleeps on the cold street  
For us to be warmed together, it’s so!  
No worry, no fear, no fright in your eyes  
Is necessary. Tonight we’re royal.

OTHELLO: What is the meaning of this? You’re bringing a prostitute into my room, and bragging your abuse of power?

DESDEMONA: Othello, just have Cassio put his coat back on and send him on his way. 

CASSIO: Oh– Othello, sir, I didn’t see you two there, I’ll be gone immediately. The night is dark, and sweet Bianca distracted my right thoughts. I’ll leave the two of you alone. 

OTHELLO: 

No, you may not leave as though no offense  
Has been dealt to Othello or to you.  
Your actions defile your post, shame your name,  
And taint this room’s white joy with your black tar.  
And for the whore– Cyprus is an outpost  
For the military, on this island  
We are true to tradition and to honor.  
A word meaningless to you, no doubt–  
Maybe if time’s hands revers’d your soul’s virtue  
Might return, and you might wed some noble  
Of importance. Instead, you act like this.  
You could trade your place with any girl  
On the dusty streets of Cairo, or in  
A dank and dirty alley in Madrid,  
And there would be no difference to find.  
By being in this house, you ruin us  
With your presence, and make ever certain  
That your soul will fly on the winds of hell!

BIANCA: Ah– help, someone, help! Please, I’m scared he might kill me. Please, please, help!

[Enter LUDOVICO and EMILIA]

LUDOVICO: What’s this screaming for? 

CASSIO: Please, everything’s perfectly alright. You’re free to go back to sleep.

EMILIA: Signor, are you drunk?

CASSIO: I–

BIANCA: Please, help, the general was overcome with fury, I’m afraid he might kill me!

LUDOVICO: General, calm yourself or I may have to use my drawn arms. I don’t want to hurt you, but in the service of protecting the defenseless among us, I will. 

OTHELLO: You would draw against me?

DESDEMONA: 

Signor Ludovico, Othello, please!  
Calm yourselves. There are women here, and we  
Have no fortitude to suffer stresses  
From your argument’s unchecked emotions.  
Signor Ludovico, you must recall  
I am a pure heart, shelter’d from the Earth  
Besides the stories Othello tells me.  
Your General is a distinguished man,  
Honor-bound, he would not raise his rapier,  
Would not raise his fist, no, your General  
Would not raise his voice lacking a deserv’d  
Target. And no crime deserves justice more  
Then a maiden’s purity violated.  
If, protecting my ears, Othello raised  
His voice, would you think it right to fault him?

LUDOVICO: No, I suppose I wouldn’t– Lieutenant, do you really seek to besmirch yourself by bringing such a base figure to this place?

CASSIO: No, no, a thousand times no, this was all a mistake. I swear, I will do what I’m able to make up for this offense.

OTHELLO: Well, you can begin by apologizing, and leaving us be. This room is not made to fit more than two. 

CASSIO: I am ultimately sorry– in the morning I will apologize again. 

[Exit CASSIO and BIANCA.]

LUDOVICO: Then everything will be fine?

DESDEMONA: Yes. No one is hurt. Our emotions must all simply be flying high from our new marriage– I apologize for any trouble. 

LUDOVICO: You weren’t the one who screamed, m’lady. 

[Exit LUDOVICO.]

EMILIA: Should I bar the door when I leave?

DESDEMONA: That would be much appreciated.

[Exit EMILIA.]

DESDEMONA: Othello, thank you for standing up for me.

OTHELLO: Of course. Always. 

DESDEMONA: My husband– your shoulders shake, you tremble. 

OTHELLO: It’s nothing to worry yourself over.

DESDEMONA: Please.

OTHELLO: 

Ludovico entered, drawing sharp steel,  
And I am afraid. After all my time,  
Each unhappy hour I fought against  
With my warrior’s frame holding only  
A hope of life together as armor  
And weapon both in one, would be pointless,  
Because Cassio had indulged in wine.  
Right before reaching our end, paradise  
Finally on the horizon after  
Sailing through the sea during a too-long night–  
I would be cut off, and thinking of loss,  
Fear overtook me. I would have lost you.

DESDEMONA: But you haven’t lost anything. You’re here with me. Together, we’re safe. The door is closed to the world outside. Here, we can be ourselves, unguarded.  


OTHELLO: I am always myself. But now, finally, I am myself with you.


End file.
